Hey Mr Tangerine Man...

Play a song for me!

I went to experience some wonderful music with celeb impersonators. Sammy Davis and Liza were pretty good! Frank...was a little scary. Up close it was even worse. He was so orange that he almost looked like he was made of wax. Someone should have warned him about the dangers of the wrong spray tan.

Sammy Davis Jr (ish), Liza, and Frank Sinatra?? Really?

 Spray Tans. He did it his way. 

Friends don't let friends become fruit.

A Tail so hot, it needed two more!

.....Because one rat tail is never enough.

This comes with a little story: I was unsure as to how I might acquire this picture when he was rather large and surrounded by even larger friends. Not wanting to get into any sort of fist-a-cuffs, I came up with a plan! Lie, lie, and lie again. I approached the group of blokes and explained that I was a Canadian who was 'fresh off the boat', and in Canada, we called those things (rat tails) "beaver tails". I said I didn't know that the fashion would have made it all the way down here, and asked if I could take his photo. He was very happy to oblige.  As you can see....so was his friend.

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I would also like to add that growing them this long takes effort and commitment...commitment to something so offensive I practically gravitated towards it. 

Someone was hooked on a feeling....

The Hoff is everywhere.


For those of you who missed this musical gem: The Hoff in Hooked on a Feeling

Quick! Call the cops!! ....

  ....someone stole his decency.
Having booked a moving company recently, I was a little put off when my movers arrived and one was a 15 year old emo kid, and the other was a 60-70 year old man with about 3 teeth in his head and only called me "girl" (not to mention they both shared the same hair dye).  All of this would have been fine (if not humorous), had I not been seated directly behind Papa Emo when he picked up a box. At first I was horrified, but was soon able to collect myself enough to follow him to the truck to capture the moment again.  I hope you enjoy it about as much as I did. I should note that Jr Emo did not share the same problems as his father: he had teeth and shorts...thank gawd.

Visual Offences - The Bali Edition

For those of you who have been to Bali, you will remember a few things were in vast supply:
1. Lady Boys
2. Items crafted into the shape of a penis
3. Englishmen holding penis shaped items

Here are a collection of those three things.

Lady....boy? She seems a little too large to be a boy...

The penis bottle opener! No BBQ is complete without it.










Jamaican accordion player with his dong out - the perfect coffee table accessory, or gift for a friend.









There was a little game we liked to play at bars called "Spot the British". Here's how it went: If you could successfully pick out the Brits at the bar, the other player had to buy the round.  Here is what we found....

And they wondered how we could tell they were British!
They sure did like their penis cups though...

I almost felt like I should have told them why they stood out...almost. 











 Last but certainly not least, the 'baby got back' statue. From the front, it was something to worship in Bali...but from the side... it was ghetto fab! Go on, back that thang up.

Food that is less than kosher...

Imagine my surprise when I pulled this out of my bag of carrots. One of those times that just begs to be documented.

Brea

Breast Munchies anyone? Who comes up with these names??

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No menu is complete without some Teriyaki Chinken made from Brest or Leg Meat.  
Another Gold Coast gem. 

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From Chinatown in Sydney - the positioning of this chicken photo produced a few giggles around the table. A must for the blog!

Cars that make you say 'Noooo'

The Gold Coast is notorious for all things visually displeasing. Here are a few cars that warranted an inclusion.

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Turning a Land Rover into a convertible? Only on the Gold Coast...

Ah yes, the Lube Mobile. For those needing lubrication on the move.

(For the record, I am aware that this is slightly less mature and more like 14yr old boy humor....and yet it still tickles me pink.)

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Do you think they meant to have P-H-A-T?

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There is nothing like shouting your faith to the world. This last one was spotted in Chinatown in Sydney. I would just like to thank God, for allowing me to spot this lovely plate. Many thanks.

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I thought this was pretty cute - Thank you St Kilda! 

Mullets and rat tails and comb-overs, OH MY!

Ah, yes. My personal favorite!

After only being in Australia for a short time, I noticed a trend...and not a visually pleasing trend. Although I am very aware that this is not representative of Australia as a whole, there is a portion of the population that feel this fashionable. I have attempted to document them, while keeping identities a secret. My tactic is this: stalk, stalk, click. I don't want to offend, which is why I keep my photography a secret. Here are a couple shots from the nest egg.

Mullet! This photo had to be taken for a few reasons. The first is fairly obvious: that hair! While this was enough to warrant an entry to the blog, the ill-fitting clothing deserves a special mention.
*I had to stalk him for a few minutes in order to get this one. 

You will notice this security guard not only has one rat tail... but a second is tucked into his shirt. Double the fun!

Ah, the comb-over. An offensive classic!

The day that created a blog-monster.

This is the photo that started it all! Let me set the scene for you:
It's a brisk winter's day in Sydney Australia. The train station is busy as people cram into a small passageway, scrambling to get to work...a man busking on the corner. A group of people huddle outside of a small coffee shop waiting for their morning fix, and two friends grumble about the boring day ahead. They sit on two low stools, trying to warm themselves with their beverage of choice, when all of a sudden they hear "GET OUT OF MY WAY!!" They look around, but see nothing. Then again..."GET OUT OF MY WAAAY!"  They crane their necks, but still cannot locate the person yelling, or what the commotion is about. All of a sudden, they hear the same scream "GET OUT OF MY WAY!!!" While they initially could not see anything out of the ordinary, the morning rush hour commuter traffic begins to part, people yelping as they jump out of the way. Careening through the middle of the parting crowd is a midget on a scooter. Not just any scooter....but a non-motorized scooter. The kind you have to really work hard to get moving. The scooter grazes the shoulder of one of the friends and narrowly avoiding a collision, but creating a wonderful photo opportunity.